It is eleven months today since Clint slipped away and left us. I still miss him every day, but time does help to dull the sharp pain of the early days after his death.
I have been away for 6 weeks visiting my family in England and finally making the long planned trip to Morocco. I found England easier to deal with than I did in the spring and came back feeling quite refreshed.
Some of you may know that I toyed with the idea of selling my house, when the plans came out for the new development that is to be built right next door to me. I thought about it a lot while I was away and have decided that if I do sell, I will not do it until the new development is built and that has made me feel much more settled.
I am not looking forward to the next month or so - too many difficult anniversaries and celebrations, so I have booked to go away. I leave in early December heading to Hong Kong, Laos, Cambodia and Vietnam, arriving back at the end of the month. While I am away I hope to write a travel blog using the new iPad that Clint's sister, Karen so generously bought me!
The Simple Alternatives Funeral Home where Clint was cremated, is holding a candlelight memorial service on December 11th to honour all the people who died this year. Although I won't be able to be there, I have included Clint's name, so if anyone would like to go, please contact the funeral home by December 5th (416-441-1580)
I will also be putting a memorial piece in The Toronto Star on December 16.
It is only because of you, my wonderful friends that I'm still standing at the end of this year and continue to feel so blessed, to have friends like you who have shared this difficult journey.
I wish you all a joyful holiday season, don't forget to tell people that you love them and live every day to the fullest.

This quote was given to me by a dear friend, who, when she had a great deal of pain in her life was often told by people (including me) that she would get over it as she was a strong woman. I now realize it wasn’t as helpful as I thought it was.

Strength and Courage
 
It takes strength to be firm,
  It takes courage to be gentle.

It takes strength to stand guard,
  It takes courage to let down your guard.

It takes strength to conquer,
   It takes courage to surrender.

It takes strength to be certain,
   It takes courage to show doubt.

It takes strength to to fit in,
   It takes courage to stand out.

It takes strength to feel a friend’s pain,
   It takes courage to feel your own pain.

It takes strength to hide feelings,
It takes courage to show them.

It takes strength to endure abuse,
   It takes courage to stop it.

It takes strength to stand alone,
   It takes courage to lean on another.

It takes strength to love,
  It takes courage to be loved.

It takes strength to survive,
   It takes courage to live.